I like this story because it’s not only true, but it also epitomizes the “sitcom nature” of my life. It also has a happy ending.
September, 2000. The anniversary of our welcome to Charleston by Hurricane Hugo in September, 1989.
( no relevance to my story, but an interesting coincidence).
It’s 630 am. Marjorie is out for her early morning walk. I’m working at the computer preparing for my day at Trident Tech. I’m a Continuing Ed instructor and program manager.
I start feeling a worrisome “pins and needle” feeling in my left arm. A slight discomfort in my chest ( no elephant sitting on your chest feeling). And I break out in a cold sweat above my neck. I instinctively go to the kitchen and pop two aspirins. ( good idea)
Marjorie comes in from her walk. I tell her my symptoms. ( calmly so I don’t worry her too much). She says, “Call our family doc”. And goes in to take a shower.
I obey ( the secret of a long, happy marriage). When I describe my symptoms to the doc he says calmly, “ Don, listen very carefully. I think you’re having a heart attack. Call 911 NOW. Do not have Margie drive you, but get an ambulance to the ER at Roper Hospital.”
I did. And the 911 operator said an ambulance was on the way.
OK. So now Marjorie gets out of the shower, where her hair got quite wet because I left the shower head pointing at her( so she says).
She asks, “Did you call the doctor?” I said yes and he told me to call 911 and they’re on the way. Here comes a sitcom gag line. She says, “ Oh no, my hair’s all wet”. I think but don’t say ( another secret of a long happy marriage) “. Ok i’ll tell them to circle the block a few times to let your hair dry.”
Well. Within a couple minutes a fire engine and EMS ambulance arrive on the street below.
I live on the third floor of a 3-story Victorian house that was developed into 7 condo units. The EMS folks are puzzling about “How the hell do we get him down from up there”?
My wife is yelling at them from our kitchen window. “Y’all just stay down there. He can walk. We’ll come down the elevator. We’ll meet you down the driveway at the elevator door.”
We get into the elevator. Close the gate and door and push the button for the bottom floor. Nothing happens. No go on the elevator. OK Don, Stay calm.
I say. “ Someone must have left the door open on second floor”. Elevator will not start if a door or gate is open. She says’”I’ll run down and check door.” She goes and pushes door firmly shut on second floor. I push the 1st floor button and down tge elevator starts to go. All’s well until the EMS dude pulls on the first floor elevator door. That, folks, stops the elevator between the 2nd and third floor. I say to myself, “Sheeit, I’m gonna die in this freakin elevator”. I didn’t. Instead I yelled, “ Push the door closed “. They did and the elevator with me in it came all the way down.
The adventure continues.
When we get to the ER, the doc puts an EKG on me and says , “Well, you’re having one.” I asked, “Having one what? He said, calmly, “You’re having a heart attack. “.
The Good Lord was watching that morning because Dr Jeff Rieder, cardiologist extraordinaire, was on duty and available to me. They took me immediately to the “catheterization ( cath) lab. Turns out, my LAD artery ( nicknamed the Widowmaker) was totally blocked. Dr Rieder unblocked it; put two stents in the artery to keep it open snd saved my life. My first symptom was at about 630. By 830 I had two stents in my LAD artery and was on thecwsy to a full recovery.
I’m still here 24 years later boring y’Ll with my happy Sitcom story.